My BlackWhite Knight
by speakingwordsofwisdom
Summary: Pennys POV. What happend AFTER the spectacular, and what how did her mother react? Penny/Seaweed, more or less. For angelinthesky-121. Pleeease r&r!
1. Chapter 1

My mother spent years trying to teacher me her version of what was right and wrong.

Mostly, i accepted what she said without question.

It was usually just easier to agree than to be locked in my room without dinner, with the Sacred Heart Choir playing non-stop in the background.

I never had a chance to think differently before.

I'd never even spoken to a coloured person before- our school, although technically integrated, kept most of the non-white kids in what was known as the "Special Ed." Class, and although the lunchroom wasn't segregated, I'd never have had the courage to just walk right up to a complete stranger and start sharing secrets, let alone kids who, my mother had promised me, would steal my lunch money and make me pregnant if I gave them half a chance.

I mean, I didn't exactly believe every word of it, but when you never hear much different... Well, what are you going to think?

Tracy was the only person i knew who never thought twice about whether someone was black or not.

She'd had the advantage of being brought up in one of the less racist families in Baltimore, and also, i guess she'd been teased so much herself she was more understanding than most.

(I was lucky enough to mostly fly under the social radar. When i was referred to at all, i was just Tracy's slightly pretty, slightly ditzy, slightly blonde friend.)

Tracey was also the one who introduced me to Seaweed. Oh, Seaweed.

My black-white knight.

When i first saw him, my first thought was "Whoa!" Coz he was gorgeous...

My second thought was...well, my second thought took a while....


	2. Chapter 2

**Thanks to angelinthesky, and , you awesome people :) i cant believe i've taken so long to update! But you'll forgive me, right? Our school did Hairspray for the winter musical in november. It was genius. But this year, i just know we'll end up doing something i've never heard of like Stomp....i mean, wtf? Anywayyyy...enjoy :)**

Meeting Seaweed was the best thing that's ever happend to me, and that includes going to Disneyland.

The split second that it took as our eyes met was all it took, and just like that, i'd forgotton everything; all my mothers warnings about how those "coloured" people were just waiting for the chance to corrupt my mind, all the sermons at church about what a threat they were to our perfect american way of life, all the stupid rules and laws and regulations that were designed just to stop more of us finding the same love i had...

All i could see was the boy in front of me, and all i knew was that this was the thing i'd been waiting for my whole life.

Sixteen years of warnings, threats, brain washing and indoctrination, boiling down to this: my hand in Seaweed's, the bass beat pounding, the heat of the lights, the cameras flashing, the laughing, screaming, singing and rejoicing around us.

And i've always thought of myself as shy but this time, i wasn't afraid.

I looked directly at the camera and smiled.

_Mother...i know you're watching this..._

I raised our clasped hands up, white against black, vanilla against chocolate. Seaweed's friends, they'd given me new name during detention, and it was only then that i rememberd it.

"I am now a checkerboard chick!" i announced, and then i kissed him, right then and there in front of the camera, in front of Tracy and Link and Amber and Maybelle. Right in front of my mother.

_Mother, can't you see how happy we are? Can't you see what i see, the same love in his eyes that he see's in mine? _

_Don't make me choose, because the choice is already made....so can you be happy for me?_

Seaweed pulls me over to where everybody is dancing, and before i give myself over to the music, to the happiness of everyone being together at last, i have one last thought...

If this- me and Seaweed together, our hands on each other, our bodies pressed close and moving to the rhythm of the song- if this,like i've always been told, so corrupt, so unnatural, so wrong.....why does it feel so right?

Okay, slightly sappy end of the second chapter. Planning on it getting a little more serious as it goes on. Next up, how does Penny's mother recieve her daughter later on? Review if you oppose segregation ;)


	3. Chapter 3

**Sooo...two chapters in one night? Guess im on a roll....Should really start my eassy but have NO ideas tbh....**

It's a perfect night...almost.

I cant help but feel a little jealous of Tracy, Link and Inez. They've all gotton what they wanted. I'm happy,too, happy for them and happy for myself....but i know that what Seaweed and I have won't be something that comes to us easily.

I'm ready to fight, of course i am.

It's just...i wish i wasn't going to have to fight my own mother.

I don't want to kill the mood, and i think i've hidden my anxieties pretty well, but then Seaweed pulls me aside and i know he can tell somethings bothering me.

Dammit. He reads me like a book sometimes.

"What's the matter, baby?"

"I'm okay..."

"Worried about your mama?"

For a second, im actually speechless. "How do you do that?"

"If i had a mama like yours, baby girl, i'd be worried 'bout her too..."

"Yeah..."

I sigh, and he pulls me into his arms and presses a kiss onto my forehead.

"You know you don't have to go through it tonight if you don't want to."

"What do you mean?"

"You can stay at with me anytime you want, will understand."

"Thanks..."

"Anytime"

**Gotta go....im in a simultaneous conversation on facebook with my ex, his best friend, this weird guy who kinda likes me and my grown up sister....**


	4. Chapter 4

**Discaimer: Oreos with marshmellows taste really good. Please don't sue me,or i wont be able to afford either.**

"You can always stay at our apartment anytime you want. Mama will understand."

" Thanks..."

I do want to go with Seaweed. I want to stay with my boyfriend, and forget that anything else exists in the world, not listen to my crazy mother tell me about how i m going to hell for ever.

But i can't. I have to go home.

There's even a tiny part of me that wants to go home because its impossible to be this happy and not want to spread it around to the people you love.

And i do love mother, despite everything, just because, i suppose.

I want her to understand, i want her to be happy for Seaweed and me.

I want her to realise how we re all the same really, that the colour of a persons skin doesn t reach their character.

Mrs Stubbs suddenly materialises in front of me, beaming, her long dress trailing like a queens robes.

"Hi, Mama"

"Hi, Mrs Stubbs"

"Call me Maybelle. Honey, have you got somewhere to stay tonight?"

It hadn t really occurred to me before that i might NOT have somewhere to stay tonight.

"Umm..." Seaweed cuts in. "I think she wants to check on her mama tonight..."

"Okay,honey..."

I can see scepticism in her eyes, and something else....concern?

"She'd worry if i didn't come home-"

"Of course, and i m glad you re thinking about her..." She pauses for a second. "Child...don t you feel too bad if your mama takes a while to come around to this. She just don t understand yet."

She turns to Seaweed.

"You're gonna walk Penny home?"

It's not a question.

"Of course, mama!" Seaweed looks a little indignant, and i smile at the look on his face.

"Tell Inez congratulations, please, Mrs Stubbs"

" I will....if i ever see her again, that is..." She looks over to where Inez is surrounded by a huge crowd of friends and admirers, and smiles proudly.

"Well, I ll leave you kids alone now. Seaweed, you try not to be home too late...and Penny..."

"Yes, Mrs Stubbs?"

"You remember what i said about your mama"

As soon as Maybelle is safely out of sight, Seaweed heaves an exaggerated sigh of relief.

"Damn,i been having to wait too long to do this..."

" Do what?"

And then his lips are against mine, his arms around me, his fingers brushing my cheek...and the world dissolves around us....

**Reviews if you would like another chapter!! xxxxxxxx**


	5. Chapter 5

**Happy Easter, everyone! Enjoy your chocolate as you read :) Really hope you enjoy this chapter!!!**

**Everyone who has reviewed: i love you guys! Your reviews make my day :)**

**Angelinthesky-121, Penny L. Pingleton, Edward-is-sexier-than-mike, no more updates 2010 and swamp fairy- this chapter is SPECIFICALLY for you :)**

*************

I'd keep the moment like that, if i could: the kiss, Seaweeds lips, his arms.... But i can't, and it's dark by the time i'm finally standing outside my own front door, trying unsucessfully to talk myself into going inside.

I wouldn't let Seaweed come with me: despite what he'd promised his mother, i let him walk me to the outskirts of my suburban neighbourhood, and then made him leave me, our last lingering goodbye said over the sign pounded into a front lawn that simply read: "Say NO To Integration!".

He practically begged me to let him walk me to my front door, but he finally, reluctantly gave in. It wasn't that i didn't want him...but i know better than to lead someone i love right into the lions den, although if i had to choose between that and a baltimore suburb at night, it would probably be safer to pick the lions.

I could count the dates off my fingers.

March 27th. That was the day the police picked up a coloured boy on the grounds that he had been intending to break into a ladys house. No evidence, no witnesses, nothing. Just the fact that he was black and in the wrong place was enough reason to take him in, and send him home later with a broken nose.

April 12th. That was the night that a kid in the grade above was beaten to a pulp by a full-grown man, who later claimed the boy had harrassed his sister. The police didn't do anything. I'm not sure they even heard about it.

May 2nd. A family set their dog on a boy who spoke to their daughter in their yard, simply because he was there. I don't know what the girl did, or what the boy said, but once Seaweed pointed him out to me when we were walking through his neighbourhoo together, and even from a distance i could see the scars.

There are more, more i've forgotton, or didn't happen to hear about at the time, some that i've blocked from my mind because i couldn't bear to think of it anymore.

Before, when i heard the stories, i would feel sad for the innocent people who were hurt, and then Tracy would call, or i'd be late for school, or Mother would be angry about something, and i'd think about that instead.

Now, i picture the stories in my mind, and every victim has Seaweeds face. Sometimes i even dream about it.

I'm not going to let my nightmares become reality.

And i'll never let Seaweed walk me home at night.

It's too dangerous. For a nice little suburb of neat white houses, manicured lawns and stiff lace curtains, there's an awful lot of hate, an ugly underbelly of anger and hate and ignorance. There's even a gang of sorts, an unofficial crowd of Junior and Senior boys who like to make it their business to take down anyone they think is stepping out of line.

Seaweed on their territory would be dangerous. Very dangerous.

I won't risk it, and i'm not going to let him risk it either.

I'm not even just thinking about us, either. I owe it to Mrs Stubbs that she doesn't lose her son, that Inez doesn't lose her brother.

And so now i'm standing here, on my doorstep, picking flakes of peeling blue paint from the door frame with my fingernail, and building up the nerve necessary to face my mother.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapterrrr 6.... i feel like i should write as much as i can before my hairspray mood wears off again, and i start writing something else... oh well. Hope you enjoy :) I'm taking time out of my REALLLY busy facebook schedule to write this lol XD**

**Disclaimer: I had a weird couple of hours talking with this guy i know, and now i feel all messed up and creeped out and slightly depressed. So don't sue me, my day sucks already. This writing is my therapy :p**

*******

I don't know what to do.

It feels like i've been standing out here for hours, although its probably only about ten minutes or so. Maybe time just goes more slowly when its dark, you're cold, and you're being forced to choose between two people you love.

I know some people would say the decisions easy- i know Tracy does...but its not. It's not just a case of right and wrong. How can it be, when the person on the "wrong" side is your own mother, and the only family you have left?

_Maybe it won't be so bad. Maybe she'll understand..._

Yeah, right.

And Mrs Turnblad will shrink to a size 0, Amber will stop being such an evil little- i mean, Amber will get over herself, and i'll get sick of cherry-flavoured lollipops.

But maybe.... i don't know. I suppose i can still hope.

As i slowly twist my key in the lock and ease the door open, i'm reminded of something Tracy said to me one time, during one of her philosophical moods: " Penny...if somethings going to go badly, you might as well just tell yourself it'll be okay."

Back then, i didn't pay much attention.

But as i pause before stepping over the threshold, it occurs to me that that's exactly what i'm doing now....

*

The hall light is off when i step inside, and that surprises me.

I half expected Mother to be waiting for me, to be greeted by a furious tirade...but theres nothing.

No bags packed in the hall, no shards of broken ornaments, not even a note.

Maybe...she already went to bed?

Its strange, but i hope she hasn't. I want this to be over, because the waiting is KILLING me: to take my punishment so at least i don't have to torture myself over it anymore.

As i take off my shoes, a low hum of voices catches my ear as conversation rises, and i see the faint strains of light filtering through the tiny gap between the living room door and the door frame.

Company? At...i check my watch that i left on the hall table...nearly 12?

For as long as i can remember, Mother has held that rule fast: no visitors before half past ten in the morning, no visitors after seven, because, apparently, according to some unwritten rule book, its "uncivilised".

She drummed it into me enough times, always followed by a twist of the lips and a half-mutterd comment about how "they" have no such standards.

"They" meant coloured families, of course.

I can't imagine Mother breaking the rule after so long, and for a split second, as i push open the door as quietly as i can, i wonder why tonight?

Then the conversation stops abruptly, several pairs of eyes fix me with identical icy stares and my heart skips a beat.

Of course.

They're here because of me.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7, written to the wonderful "Chavs of 2023" by Amy Leeder, while eating an easter egg. Fun day tomoro_i get to REVISE... I'm also planning on converting my closest guy friend to Hairspray since he has so far refused to watch it with me. Wish me luck lol :)**

**Hope you enjoy this chapter, any suggestions are welcome, and all you reviewers are freakin' awesome people :) x**

************

"They" are Mother's friends.

Or maybe friends is the wrong word, since all of them are people very much like Mother herself- angry, bitter, and filled with their narrow-minded beliefs. In other words, the kind of people who can go through their entire lives without either a friend, or the need for one.

The only time Mother ever speaks to them is when something is wrong (they don't even say more than a "good morning" at church)- like vultures, they circle the neighbourhood and then gather together, to swoop down upon anyone unfortunate enough to be in their way.

The last time they met was to write a letter to the local radio station, petitioning for them to ban "race music". The time before that, they lobbied the school board to protest against black students being allowed to attend classes.

The time before that, it was to "persuade" the local library to get rid of books they felt were "unsuitable for white christians to be reading".

The time before that.... it just goes on and on!

Not that i ever thought they'd approve of me and Seaweed being together....but i AM surprised at their speed. Usually, they take at least a day to gather.

I'm frozen in the doorway, and i can feel their eyes on me. I don't have to look at them to picture them: all of them tall, and perfectly coiffed, their colour-coordinated outfits perfectly ironed, blue eyed and blonde haired, three men and five women.

They're clusterd in the center of the room, and in the middle, seated on a pouffe, is my mother, her eyes red from crying.

She raises her head to look at me.

There is no warmth and no forgivness in her eyes.

****

**Sorry for such a short chapter but my head realllly aches**

**xx**


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: I really hope i don't cause any offence with the language in this chapter. I'm only using it because i wanted to show the attitudes of Prudy and her friends, and i don't think they would've cared about causing offence. If anyone has an issue with it, please email me and i'll cut it from the chapter.**

I'm not sure exactly what i meant to say to her.... but whatever i meant to say or could've said, i know i can't say it here.

Maybe i would've pleaded with her, had we been alone, maybe i would've begged her to understand, maybe i would've appealed for her as my mother to try to accept something which has made me so happy.... but words like forgivness and love don't belong in a room with these people.

And then long talon-like fingers take my arm in an iron-grasp, and push me roughly into the center of the room.

And i'm too afraid to move or to speak.

"How DARE you?" A cold voice hissing at my ear, nails digging into my skin, and i'm being shaken like a cat.

Then a cacophany of voices all at once:

"Dancing with those _niggers_-"

"On television-"

"In public-"

"Disgraceful!"

"Such langauge!"

"Disgusting-"

"And being brought up in such a christian household-"

"Such an evil influence-"

They surround me on all sides, until one of the men cuts in, and they force me down onto the sofa.

"Do you have ANY idea what you've done to your mother?"

He's one of the priests right-hand men, he often gives lectures to the students at school about "christian behaviour", and theres something about him that makes people listen to him: even now, as he forces me to look over at where Mother is sitting, i actually feel a pang of guilt.

"She's done her best to bring you up as a good christian girl...and you repay her with THIS kind of behaviour?"

Another woman breaks in: "It's that nigger-loving girl she talks to who is to blame!"

"I've always said, those coloured people are just out to corrupt the children of good white folk-"

"Letting that boy touch her like that....its filthy, thats what it is!"

There's a murmur of agreement at this, and suddenly anger has replaced my fear, and i try to spring from the couch.

"Don't you DARE talk about Seaweed like that!" Hands immeadiatly push me back down, but that doesn't make me lower my voice. I'm inarticulate with anger, so angry i can barely find the words. "He's a GOOD person, he's a better person than ANY of you, and so's Tracey! I HATE YOU, I HATE ALL OF YOU-"

A slap to my face cuts me off, the CRACK of the blow cuts the air, and i'm knocked back against the sofa with the force of it.

I can feel the mark of their hand like an evil tattoo against my cheek; as i slowly straighten up, i can see spots of blood on my dress and feel the blood, hot on my skin, dripping from my nose. Tears burn my eyes, blur the room, blur the angry shapes around me.

"You are the devils child!" A woman suddenly hisses into my face, and then a second slap catches my shoulder.

"She is a corrupting influence here!" The second man interjects "She is being used as a tool by the niggers to destroy our christian values!"

A third blow, to the other side of my face.

In this room, surrounded by furious adults and my mother, who watches while i am beaten, i am afraid.

Filthy....evil...disgusting....disgraceful....sickening...corrupt....

I stop hearing individual tirrades, and the noises mix into a single voice. But among them, i know my mother is still silent.

Another stinging slap, and then hands seizing me, pushing me to the floor.

"Get down on your knees! Get down and BEG for gods forgivness! BEG for his mercy!"

Its the man again, forcing me into the position of prayer at my mothers feet.

"ASK FOR FORGIVNESS!"

I can't breathe any more. I'm gasping, tiny puffs of air, and i feel like i'm suffocating.

I know, somehow, that nothing they can do will make mother intervene.

"REPENT YOUR SINS!"

I'm at the mercy of these people.

And i've never been more afraid.

"BEG, CHILD!"

At first i can't make a sound, but then a name rises to my lips.

"S-Seaweed..."

More blows, to my face, my neck, my shoulders.

_Seaweed...Seaweed, please rescue me... I need you...._

_"_BEG!"

"Seaweed!"

A pause, a break, a lapse in time, a shocked silence...

"DEVIL CHILD!"

The voice, the voice of one who has been silent so long.....my mothers scream pierces me.

"You are the tool of SATAN! You have enterd his service!"

She has risen from her seat, and backs away, to point a shaking finger at me.

"Lord jesus, save me from this evil!"

"Mother-"

"BE SILENT!" she shrieks, and i flinch at the venom in her voice.

"I have TRIED and TRIED to raise you as a child of jesus.... I GIVE UP!" she suddenly wails "God forgive me, i give up!"

"Mother-!"

"Silence!" She pauses for a second, then breaks, turns and covers her face with her hands. I can hear her sobbing.

They let go of me then, converging in a new cluster, to comfort her.

I'm left, still kneeling on the carpet, blood mingling with tears i've only just noticed, and too much in shock to wipe them away.

After a minute, one of the women turns to me.

"Get out of this house-"

I don't move because....surely she can't tell me to leave? Don't i still live here?

Part of me is hoping this is just a bad dream. It feels like one....but its so vivid...too vivid. Too real.

My mothers voice, muffled, sends a shot through me.

"GO! Just....go...."

I could stay, i could argue....but the man starts to turn, and i'm terrified of more violence if i don't leave, so i go.

My face still stinging from the slaps, i get to my feet and stumble out, through the hall, through the front door.

It slams behind me.

On the empty pavement outside, in the dark, i stand and wait for this nightmare to end.

And then, when it doesn't, i start to walk, one step at a time.

Slowly, painfully, my feet carry me futhur and futhur away from the house that i can't help but call home.

*******

**Longgggg chapter this time! Please r&r, so i know my effort wasnt wasted :)**


	9. Chapter 9

I walk although i'm tired and hurting.

I walk although i'm cold and it's dark.

I walk although my world is ending.

The streets are nearly deserted, the moon huge above the town.

At first, i walk without direction, without thought, without wondering where i'm going, because how can you think about anything when all you can think of is how you're alone now?

But then i pass a familiar looking store, and a streetname catches my eye.

And i suddenly know where i'm going after all.

*

The bright red paint of the doorframe is flaking away. Blood red.

Like Tracey, Seaweeds flat is above Ms Maybelles record store, but as far as i know, you have to go through the store to get to the front door.

I'm standing on the door step. I don't want to ring the bell, i can't bring myself to walk away either.

The store is empty, the shelves are cast in shadows; in the glass part of the door, i can see my reflection, but nothing else.

I don't want to look at myself right now, anyway, and i keep my eyes on the peeling paint.

I've got my finger on the bell....only just... and its only after i hear someone shout out in one of the streets beyond that i jump, and press down without thinking.

A bell jangles somewhere in the far recesses of the shop; i hold my breath and wait.

Part of me hopes nobody heard anything.

At least it will stop me having to explain why i'm standing on a doorstep at one thirty am. Even i'm not sure why i'm here: even though i have nowhere to go, i can't ask to stay here. I know the family doesn't have a big flat or a lot of money, any more than anyone here does.

I stay, though.

I stay because i can't think of anywhere else to go, and bite my lip as the unmistakable shape of Ms Maybelle approaches the frosted glass.


	10. Chapter 10

I don't think i fall apart that often.

I mean, it's not like i have a reputation or anything (a slightly blonde lollipop addict doesn't count as a reputation, okay?), but i'd like to think i'm fairly strong. I mean, i survived my mother, didn't i?

So yeah. Usually i'm strong. Ish.

But tonight? No.

When Ms Maybelle opens the door, she looks annoyed, like she thinks its a prank or something.

Then she sees me....and i don't even want to imagine what i look like. Blood, tears and bruises, it's not nice.

She looks so surprised for a couple of seconds, and then she just looks concerned.

I know i should explain what i'm doing here, i know i should say SOMETHING.

But when i try to talk, i don't make a sound, like my throats stopped working.

Then i try again...and i burst into tears.

So.... not exactly strong. Or a good explanation of why i'm on her doorstep in the middle of the night.

But honestly? I really don't care. All i can think of is that my mother has just thrown me out, it still hurts where they hit me, and if Ms Maybelle closes the door i have nowhere to go.

But she doesn't close the door. (I should've known she wouldn't. But then again, i'd always assumed that home would always be home, and look how THAT turned out.)

She's somehow able to pull me inside, give me and hug and then lock the door again, all in one movement, and the next thing i know, she's sort of guiding me into their kitchen, and pulling out a chair from the table.

"Sit down, honey" She hands me some kleenex, and sits down in the opposite chair. "Okay. Does your mother know you're here?"

I know if i say anything i'll just start crying again. So i shake my head instead.

I'm surprised when she seems to accept that. Her expression is like she just having her suspicions confirmed.

"And how did this happen?" She gently touches my cheek.

I swallow hard and wonder what i can say.

I don't want to lie to Ms Maybelle...but there's also still a part of me that is loyal to mother.

When i just shrug and keep my eyes on the floor, she sighs.

"Sweetheart, did your mother do this to you?"

"N-no..."

Scepticism hangs in the air.

"It...it really wasn't her, Ms Maybelle. Her friends were in the room...." I trail off. To say your own mother sat by and watched someone do this to you....well, thats nearly as bad as her doing it herself.

I can tell Ms Maybelle thinks so too.

"Honey, i'm so sorry you had to go through that..." As she goes over to the sink, i can hear her talking half to herself. "Lord, you give some people a whole lot of hate and anger..."

She comes back a wet wash cloth, sits back down, and then the clock chimes the quarter hour. It's 1.45.

"Penny-"

"Y-yes?"

"It's late, and questions can wait until morning. But first you need to know a couple of things. Firstly, do you remember what i said about your mama?"

I nod again.

"I stand by that, child. Some people don't always do or say the right thing first time round. Its just a matter of waiting until they do. Your mama will come around sooner or later. But don't ever blame yourself or think you could've done anything differently. None of this is your fault. Do you hear me?"

I'm not sure i quite believe her, not about any of it....but its nice to be told it wasn't my fault, for a change. I can't remember mother ever saying that to me.

"Yes..."

"Good. Second thing, honey, you stay here as long as you want to. You can get your clothes later, for now you can borrow some of Seaweeds things. If he's thought to pick them up off the floor yet, that is... "

And just like that...i'm suddenly given the gift of a new home.

*****

Soooo.... did you like it? Hate it? Any improvements/criticisms? Flames are welcome, i'm a little cold... XD

A/N: Swamp fairy and angelinthesky-121.....i love you! Your reviews are really nice_ chapter 10 is espeacially for you :) :)


	11. Chapter 11

**Beautiful day in bedford today_even revision is nice when you're by the river! Plus i saw my friend Yaz for the first time in ageeeees :) Enjoy, my beautiful people!**

**Question: Did anyone else used to watch the s club 7 tv series? I've started watching them on youtube, and omg, the memories!!! Favourite episode, anyone? Some hilarious cliches of america ("This is billy-bob, johnny-joe and bobby-jim" LMAO)**

********

After i've cleaned myself up (and very nearly freaked out all over again at the amount of blood), Ms Maybelle finds me some blankets and pillows, and says she's sorry that they don't have a lot of room, since i have to sleep on the couch.

I'm just greatful for ANY place to stay, and so tired that the couch could be a bed of nails, and i wouldn't mind, to be honest.

Thank goodness tomoro is saturday.

Later on, before i go to sleep, i can't stop thinking about how weird it will be on Monday. All the dynamics are completly mixed up now. It used to be Amber and Link on top of the pyramid, since they were the lead dancers....but now Inez has Ambers title, and Tracy has Ambers boyfriend....so what will Amber be left with?

It's going to be bizarre. (Even after everything tonight, i still have a corner of my mind free to wonder how it will play out.)

Is this how it felt for the russians, waking up one morning to find the tsar overthrown, and the Bolshevists in his place?

Anyone who believes this is very different obviously has NO understanding of high school, at all....

I fall asleep pretty quickly, to much lighter thoughts than i would've expected.... but half way through, my dreams change, getting faster, darker, louder, scarier. Blurred figures and sinister shadows surround me, waves of darkness engulf me, and mothers face swims in and out, sometimes near, sometimes far....

I wake up with a jump, cold sweat prickling my forehead, to sunlight streaming through a gap in the brown checked curtains, and Seaweedd sitting beside me and holding my hand.

He looks worried, and his chocolate-smooth skin is actually PALE....but he smiles anyway.

"Hey,sleeping beauty"

I suffer maybe five excruciatingly long seconds of wondering where i am, and why Seaweed is in my bedroom before i start to remember....and then everything floods back at once.

"Hi...." I sit up, brushing my hair out of my face.

"Are you ok? You looked like you were having one badddd dream"

"I'm fine...." Surprisingly, i think i am. I mean, sure, i'm a little weirded out, but what else is new? Although there is the fact that Seaweeds very presence sometimes seems to have healing powers...

"Really?" He doesn't sound like he believes me ( I don't think Seaweed believes in his own magic....), and i wonder why he's looking at me like that?

I raise a hand to touch my face.

Oh, right. The bruises.

"Yeah..." I suddenly fling my arms around his neck, with a speed that surprises both of us. "It's really, really, really good that you're here, though..."

Grinning, he hugs me back. "Always a nice surprise to find a beautiful girl in the house when you wake up." He checks his watch. "Definitly an improvment. I usually have to wait a couple more hours before i get to kiss you..."

About two seconds later, Inez appears, and Seaweed pulls back. Inez doesn't seem at all surprised to see me, just skips through the room, singing out a "Hi, Penny!" before she dissapears through the other door.

I smile. It's nice to feel welcome.

******

A/N Penny had such a bad time in the other chapters, i'm giving her a little break to recuperate :) Reviews always welcome_ I'll give them a good home :)


	12. Chapter 12

**Please forgive me if i subtly put a whole lot of dates and facts into the story....we're doing the civil rights movement in a level history, and i'm revising it now.... What do you say? Tension between supporters of Martin Luther King and Malcolm X? Is Seaweed a member of the NAACP, the anti-white SNCC or the occaisionally unpopular SCLC? Look at me, i'm a history nerd! **

********

I never used to realise that families could be different to mine.

When i first met Tracy, in kindergarten, just after Daddy....left, it was a big surprise to see that not all mothers were like mine, that not every kid my age was called "devil child" or tied to the bed, and that some mothers even did other things than read the bible, or say their rosary.

I was surprised that Tracys mother would play with her. She was surprised that mine didn't.

Eating breakfast with Seaweeds family felt just like that. I think i'd got so used to eating in near-silence every day, i'd almost forgotton anything different: hearing people laugh, and talk about more than just how corrupt the world was becoming, felt so different.

It was a lovely change, though.

*

"Well, thats the last of the pancakes" Ms Maybelle started to pile up the dishes, and stood up. "I have to go open up the shop. Inez?"

"Yes, mama?"

"Its your turn to do the dishes."

"But-"

"No buts. You can play afterwards. Let me know if you're going to go anywhere new, okay?"

"Okay..."

"And what are you kids planning to do today?"

Seaweed shrugged. "We hadn't really thought about it. If you need us in the shop-"

"No, no. You enjoy yourselves while you can. I may need some help tomorow, though. Right, i have to get going.....now where did i put my keys....?"

"Do you want any help with the dishes, Inez?" i asked.

She shook her head, then stuck her tongue out at Seaweed. "Thanks. But i'm ok. See? Someone's nice around here"

He pulled a face back. "Hey, i'm nice.... sometimes. Have fun with the washing up!"

"Meh. Have fun KISSING!"

Seaweed laughed and grabbed my hand. "Come on. Lets go before Inez bullies me any more. Bye, mama-"

"Bye, honey"

"Bye, Ms Maybelle, Inez"

Seaweed pulled me out of the front door. "It sounds like the Waltons!"

The door closed on Ms Maybelle and Inez's goodbyes, and we were out into the sun.

*****

A/N Short chapter, sorry. I do have ideas, i swear. Thanks a million to all reviewers, i love you guys!


	13. Chapter 13

For a while, we just sort of wander, hand in hand through the sun-bathed streets, revelling in just being together. I haven't been around Seaweeds part of town very often- the platter party a few days ago was the first time i'd ever crossed the invisible line that separates the predominantly black stores and housing from the local schools and the suburbanized streets where my house is.

There's a different feel to this neighbourhood- for one thing, everybody seems to know each other, and i mean EVERYBODY. Seaweed gives about a million high fives before we've gone more thana few streets.

"So, what do you think?" he asks, sliding his arm around me without breaking his stride.

"About what?"

"About being here. This-" he gestures with his free hand, and lowers his voice "All of this. Being on the wrong side of the tracks."

Seaweeds scary voice is about as threatning as the purring of a basket of kittens, and i laugh. "The wrong side of the tracks?" There's no railway any where near here.

He gets my point. "Ok, metaphorical tracks. Whatever. Point is, you're not in kansas anymore, baby"

"Check out my ruby slippers...." Seaweed raises an eyebrow at my scuffed tennis shoes, which have definitly seen better days.

"So if i'm Dorothy, then that makes you....the tinman?"

He shakes his head. "Nah. His voice is wayyyy too effeminate-"

"The lion?"

"Hey, i'm braver than i look, baby"

"The scarecrow?"

He widens his eyes in mock-horror. "You calling me messy?"

"Yes!"

I stand on tip toe, and wrap my arms around his neck. "That was all a set up so i could crush your ego, and now i think i'll go sleep with Link. Goodbye-"

I start to walk away, and get about 3 steps before i feel arms around my waist, lips against my neck.

"Aw, c'mon! Seriously? You want cracka-boy? I thought i was your knight in shining armour" He pauses "Damn, does that mean i'm the tinman guy?"

"Yes." I turn so we're face to face, and reach up to kiss him. "But i still love you"

"Then i won't have to beat Link up to impress you?"

Seaweeds expression is completly neutral- he's so much better at wind ups than i am- but i'm already laughing.

"Don't ever feel you can't beat someone up to impress me...."

Seaweed grins. "Aw, thanks, baby-"

Some girls are playing at the corner on the other side of the street, and their skipping song changes.

"Seaweed and the white girl sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G..."

We break apart, reluctantly, and Seaweed shakes his head,

"Damn. And i thought your mama was bad...."

We start walking again, hand in hand, the sounds of the skipping game fading behind us.

"So, back to where we were.... what do you think?"

I look around. "It seems nice..." I pause "It's strange being_ the white girl_, though"

"Sorry about them. But most people don't really notice stuff like that here...." He stops "Or at least, they don't usually talk about it"

"Yeah..." A thought suddenly occurs to me "Hey, whats with all the wrong side of the tracks stuff? You said it was no big deal"

"When did i say that?"

"When Link asked you before, if coming over here would be safe"

"Oh yeah....cracka-boy.... the start of a beautiful nickname...."

"Be serious. What changed?"

He shrugs. "I don't know... I'm just exaggerating. He acting like it was detroit or something, and its not like its THAT bad here...."

He stops, brushes a few strands of hair away from my face. "But i know its different to what you're used to. And I like Link, and everything, but you're so much more important to me. I just want you to be-"

"I know. But being here is already so much better than where i was before"

He looks surprised. "Why?"

"Because here, you're with me"

The sun beats down, children laugh and play, doors slam, dogs bark, people pass us by..... but all i'm aware of is Seaweed, his lips, his arms.....and he is all that matters.

************

**Hope you enjoyed! Please r&r! I'll carry on if enough people want me to :)**


	14. Chapter 14

A/N: Verrrrryyyy important note!!!!!

I meant to say this before: PLEASE DO NOT BE OFFENDED IF YOU LIVE IN DETROIT/LIKE DETROIT ETC

I'm sure its a lovely place (Never been to america, probably never will

I wasn't trying to insult ANYONE_Its just that in history right now, we're learning about the ghettoization in north america in the early 1900s and detroit was the biggest ghetto by the 1950s/60s, and therefore pretty dangerous.

So again, NO OFFENSE INTENDED!

Chapter 14 should be up soon :)

Anyone got anything they espeacially want to happen later? XX


	15. Chapter 15

Probs just a short chapter, while i wait for my hair dye to set. Enjoy, girls! (I'd say guys too, but lets face it, what guys are gonna read this? Tho if YOU are a guy....omg, i love you!)

*****

Seaweed asks me where I want to go, but I don't really mind, because everywhere is good, as long as Seaweed comes with me.

Cheesy, i know. Tracy would die laughing if she heard me talking to a boy like this. My mother would probably just die.

I tell him i don't care, then i change my mind, and ask if he knows where Link is today, because chances are that wherever Link is, Tracy will be, too, and I want to talk to her about everything thats happend since yesterday. It feels like million years, although its just been a few hours.

Turns out that neither us have any good ideas about where they might be, so we decide to go over to the other....ok, the white side of the neighbourhood, and hope that we bump into them.

We're lucky- walking along the edge of the park, laughing at the story Seaweeds telling, about replacing the baby jesus in the church nativity scene one christmas, when he was about 8, with Inezs minnie mouse doll. Apaarently, it took a week for anyone to notice the switch... and just as he's saying it, i hear a shriek and when we look around, we see Tracy and Link running over to us.

Tracy flings herself on me and we hug, while Link and Seaweed stand a little awkwardly next to us and exchange "heys". I know they're friends, but they're still slightly at a loss of what to do when me and Tracy are paying no attention to them...


	16. Chapter 16

Hope you enjoy_its all thanks to Penny L. Pingleton for encouraging to update, cos otherwise i'd still be wandering aimlessly through the twilight fics....

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Link suggests that we go get the rest of my stuff after a while, and Seaweed backs him up.

I'm not really sure if i want to venture back home quite so soon, but since i havent told any of them about last night yet, i know its not their fault.

To be honest, i think they just want to play being tough guys for a while- this whole thing must be more than a little bit "damsel in distress", even if the distress is only that i have to wear yesterdays dress.

We don't have enough money for a bus, and we don't know anyone with a car to ask for a lift, so we decide to walk it.

It's not that far, but it feels ominous, somehow. Possibly the fact that Seaweed is even more of an outsider in my neighbourhood than i am in his; it feels risky to even have him come with us.

Halfway down the main street, between a mechanics with a hand painted sign, and a boarded up ice cream parlour, i try to talk Seaweed into staying behind.

"Please? I just don't think its a good idea..."

"So i'm supposed to let you go somewhere thats too dangerous for ME? What sort of guy would that make me?"

"A smart one?"

"And what if something happens to you because i'm not there? If its too dangerous for me, its too dangerous for you to go alone"

"Seaweed, you know exactly why you can't come, so stop being so stubborn!"

I hate having to say it. Even more, i hate the flicker of pain that crosses his face when i say it. I don't want to hurt him...but i love him enough to hurt him if i have to.

For a second, i think he isn't going to answer. Then he starts to talk, evenly, calmly, but without looking at me.

"Penny, i've lived in lots of places. And in seventen years, there has ALWAYS been something i can't do or somewhere i can't go. I don't like to be reminded of it, but its true. And usually theres nothing i can do about it."

He stops, and turns me to face him, gripping my shoulders.

"But i am NOT going to be kept out of this. Penny, when we lived in Alabama, i remember my mama telling me not to talk to white girls...cos she was scared i'd get lynched for it. We weren't allowed into the local school, because it was against the law! Damn, i've been kept out of too many places in my life....just for being black."

He starts to walk again.

"..and I'll die before i let any white kid keep me out of anywhere else..."

I'm stunned, silent. The tall dark boy striding away from me, full of pent up fury, whose eyes burn into mine, is not Seaweed. I don't know who he is.

I don't recognize him....and i'm afraid. I need to bring him back, i need to find MY Seaweed again.

My throat is tight, but somehow i manage to call his name, and he whirls around.

"What?!"

"I'm...I'm sorry"

The words are too small, too quiet, too insignificant compared to what i feel. What am i apologising for? For trying to make him stay behind? For making him angry? For trying to protect him? For being part of the privileged white community? For this whole stupid society that began when the first slave ship docked in port? Or for not realising that he ever had these feeling in the first place because i was so wrapped up in my own problems?

Maybe it's everything.

"I'm sorry...."

His face twists bitterly. "What does that change?"

I could cry...but i stand my ground and force myself to look him in the eye.

"Nothing. It changes nothing. But i'm still sorry."

I wait, he waits. I hold my breath, our eyes locked, waiting to see what he will do. Seaweed waits to see what he will do.

After a long, long moment, he opens his mouth.

Then he closes it again. And slowly covers his face with his hands.

I still don't move...but i let myself breathe again.

"Hey, are you guys coming or not?" Link yells to us, and Seaweed moves his hands slowly.

"Yeah, we're coming..." he calls back....then he looks at me.

"Penny...oh god, baby, i'm sorry-"

"It's alright-"

"I shouldn't have-"

"It wasn't your-"

He comes over to me, and crushes me against his chest, fiercly.

"I'm so sorry, baby, i don't know why i took it out on you-"

I hug him back. "Don't worry about it, i shouldn't have tried to stop you from coming..."

"I HAVE to come...i couldn't let you go by yourself. I care about you too much..."

When we step back, and i look into his face, i know i can relax, because he's my Seaweed again.

XXXXXXXXXXX

r&r if you want another chapter, or want to see any changes :) xx


	17. Chapter 17

Ok my computer failed before i could save the rest of this, but heres half, three days later, for Penny Pingleton :)

XXXXXXXXXX

It feels so strange to be here again.

These are the same streets i've walked all my life. Here is the corner where Tracy and I used to play skipping and tag and hopscotch...i can see the faded chalk squares in my minds eye, i can feel the coloured powery dust on my fingertips, i can hear our laughter.

We were so innocent then...and i miss it. Now there are causes, there is standing up for the right thing, there is living on the wrong side of town.

Suddenly our lives are bigger than this town- the tiny circle of home and school and church. Somehow, everything we do- the choices we make, the people we talk to, the side we choose in this battle that i never used to even know was being fought- has a greater significance.

Somewhere along the line, we stopped automatically assuming our parents and teachers beliefs: the coloured part of town, race music, whites only stores, and found a new mantra. Segregation became integration. Separate but equal turned to freedom now.

Its exhilirating to feel that we have the power to change something.

But its also terrifying.

Walking through the familiar streets that suddenly feel strange to me, i know that everything: Tracys freedom march, Seaweeds outburst, my mothers reaction last night...it's all just the tip of the iceberg.

There's more to come, more of everything. There will be racists bigger than my mother, who will react more violently. Many other people will be justifiably just as angry as Seaweed, and it will take much more time and work than one little march before anything changes.

We don't seem old enough for this, for any of this.

I feel like i'm standing on a great precipice, or at the foot of a mountain.

Its too big to contemplate.

But its too late to turn away now, even if i wanted too. I don't, i honestly don't...but at the same time, i still feel overwhelmed.


	18. Chapter 18

AS levels finally overrrr! Love to all my reviewers. Espeacially Penny Pingleton, who i know has waited very patiently for me to update :)

xxxxxxx

It feels so wrong to walk these streets now.

I don't belong here anymore.

Its strange...because in one way, everythings so familiar.

I KNOW these streets, i grew up here, i've walked them a million times to school, to church. I spent half my childhood playing here.

There's the corner where Tracy and i played endless games of hopscotch, and i can still feel the slippery powder of pink chalk dust on my fingers.

Pink was the only colour we'd use, after declaring all other colours known to human kind to be "boy colours".

Theres the same fence post we'd tie one end of the skiping rope to: the third post from the left, of the fence of the white house with eucalyptus trees either side of the sliding glass doors.

And here's my street.

And here's my house.

And i'm afraid, more than afraid... because it doesn't feel like my house any more.

The back of my neck prickles; Seaweed squeezes my hand as if he can tell how i feel.

Number 36.

This is where Penelope Louise Pingleton, golden child, lived out her whiter-than-white childhood, perfect and untouched by everything except what her mother chose to allow past the starched lacey curtains of the front room.

This is also where that same childhood ended, less than 24 hours ago.

Although sometimes i think that it ended long before last night, that it began to slip away from me the moment Seaweeds hand touched mine.

Or maybe it goes back even furthur. Maybe the begining of the end was really the moment Seaweed was born- one month, seventeen days, eight hours and 54 minutes after i was.

Who knows?

"Penny!"

A voice brings me back to the surface: Tracys tone, that tells me she may have called me several times before i responded.

"Sorry, what did you say?"

"Link asked how we were going to go in"

Through the front door...its on the tip of my tongue... but before i can say it, i realise i actually don't feel right walking straight in.

"I...I have no idea-"

"Excellent. So, the window it is then?"

Link. Grinning like a kid in a playground.

"Slow down, cracka-boy... I think i've had the most experience with going through windows actually"

"Actually...i think you'll find it was MY idea."

"So?"

"So i get to go through the window!"

"Oh yeah, thanks for INVENTING the window..."

I look sideways at Tracy and she rolls her eyes at me.

Clearly, watching our boyfriends try to out do one another on the manliness scale isn't doing it for her.

I roll my eyes back, but i kind of like it. It takes the pressure off everything, makes it less intense.

"Ahem...boys?" Tracys put on her teacher-voice.

"What?"

"Who said we were going through windows in the first place?"

"Who said we weren't?"

"Why can't we just go through Pennys door like normal people?"

"Cos i don't want holy water thrown on me today! This is my favourite shirt!" Link, cluthing the tail of his blue shirt protectivly.

"Yeah, and i don't want a burning cross shoved in my face!" That's Seaweed, and he looks half serious.

"But if we go through her window, someone might call the police!"

"But its her house!"

"But they still might!"

Link opens his mouth, and i just know what he's about to say: he isn't scared of the police, they can't do anything to him...

And then he closes his mouth again and nods reluctantly.

"Ok. So what should we do?"

I catch Seaweeds eye. And i know that he knows the real reason Link backed down: because while it may be true they might do nothing to Link, i can think of several officers in this town who'd love an excuse to take in some no-good coloured boy.

I feel his anger, like a wave washing over us all, for the second time this day... but then he smiles at me, as if to say "Its ok", and i smile back. "I know".


	19. Chapter 19

"So...we're just going to walk in?"

We're actually going to DO this?

True, i do want the rest of my stuff, dince i have zero money to buy new clothes, and i can't even borrow anything from Tracey, since i'm a good several inches taller than she is... but i can't completly smother the instinct that tells me to grab Seaweed and run with him until we're back in his part of town, with his family, where its safe.

It was Traceys idea that we should just try the door to see if it was locked, before we did anything else, and it was settled upon, purely because no one could think of any better ideas. I knew it made sense, but standing there on the doorstep made me flash back to the last time I'd stood there, and the memory seared my skin.

But it was Seaweeds hand, finding its way to mine, that reminded me now was also different: this time, i wasn't alone.

"Are you going to knock?"

I hesitated. No one else had tried the door yet, and the unspoken concensus that it was my house, therefore my right to go first, hung heavy. "Umm...I don't know..."

A long creakkk-kk-kk.

"Doors open"

Tracey shrugged, and smiled at Links embarrassment that he hadn't tried it first, Seaweeds relief we wouldn't spend the rest of the day out here waiting for me to do it, my surprise-and-relief that someone had actually DONE something.

It was my house, it didn't seem like my house at all...but steping over the threshold, i recognized the smell of fresh bread and windex that my mind automatically responded to as home, and shiverd as we walked, very quietly, very carefully, down the hall, following Traceys lead.

Link winced every time his loafers squeaked; i was gripping Seaweeds hand so hard i'm surprised he had any blood circulation left; Tracey was pointedly calm.

We were close, so close, i could see my white painted doorframe...and i saw Traceys reaction before i saw into my room itself.

Her little "oh!" of surprise, the way she quickly glanced back at me...

"What is it?"

I pulled Seaweed forward...and stepped back suddenly.

The bed was stripped, the linens and quilt gone. Half of my draws were pulled out and empty, the top shelf of my bookcase, clothes spilt from their hangers in my open wardrobe.

Clothes and books, obviously dropped, were strewn across the carpet.

It looked as if someone had circled the room, sweeping things into a box, and then stormed out with it, anger making them clumsy.

Which was probably exactly what had happend.


End file.
